The article critiques the use of fear tactics in parenting advice seen on social media, emphasizing that such tactics often lead to reactive and controlling responses from parents. It highlights the importance of understanding that children and teens are individuals who require acceptance and support rather than control. The author advocates for parenting approaches filled with curiosity, love, and acceptance, stressing that viral advice can foster unrealistic expectations and authoritarian methods that may ultimately harm both parents and children. Overall, thoughtful engagement and emotional connection are essential for healthy parenting.
In a world that has recently seemed more foreboding, is scaring parents really the way to go? As a clinical psychologist with over 20 years' experience working with children, teens, and parents, I think not.
A lot of parenting advice that goes viral on social media implies that 'good parents' make sure that their children or teens feel, think, or behave in certain ways-ideally in ways that adults or 'experts' have deemed appropriate.
But suggesting that parents must ensure that kids feel or think a certain way lends itself to authoritarian parenting (with poorer outcomes for kids and parents), tremendous anxiety, and an impossible standard to uphold.
People-especially our kids-aren't meant to be controlled, and honestly, they don't cooperate with it anyway.
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