"I feel trapped and resent all I have to do as a working mum while she's here, but that's compounded by guilt as I know I'm very privileged to have a big house and a well-paid job. I hate that she sees me at my worst (rowing with my husband/sorting out arguments between the kids) and I feel as if I'm constantly keeping my emotions in check around her. Our friendship feels warped into a parent-child dynamic."
"You need to check where you stand legally. If you live in England and Wales, Rycroft didn't think the payment of 350 could be said to give your friend acquired equity in the house as it's clearly for expenses, and she doesn't have exclusive occupation, which might have given her a right to stay indefinitely. Ideally, you would have got her to sign a formal lodger agreement to set things out, so please get the relevant legal advice."
A homeowner invited a friend to live temporarily after selling a house; no written agreement existed. The friend pays £350 monthly toward bills but did not retrain, secure a new job, or save to move out. The homeowner feels trapped, resentful, guilty about relative privilege, and constrained around emotional expression; the friendship shifted toward a parent-child dynamic. Legally in England and Wales, payments for expenses without exclusive occupation or written lodger agreement are unlikely to create acquired equity or a right to stay indefinitely. Practical steps include obtaining legal advice, creating a formal lodger agreement, and having a clear, firm conversation enforcing the original timeline.
Read at www.theguardian.com
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