To paraphrase The Sound of Music - possibly the least appropriate filmic reference ever, given the subject matter - how do you solve a problem like Versace? Actually, that's rude. Versace isn't a problem, it's a fucking gem, a treasure, a vaulted palazzo ceiling of fat floating cherubs and cow-eyed gods and goddesses. It's a Caravaggio painting, a Puccini opera. In short, an Italian masterpiece.