"My good friend is about to get married, and I think she is making a huge mistake. She is young, beautiful and successful, and her fiancé is more than twice her age, six times divorced, has several children ranging from preschool age to adult age, and doesn't have a relationship with any of them. He's also unemployed, broke, and was couch-surfing when they met only eight months ago. She wants to start trying for children immediately after the wedding."
"Your concerns are justified. I admit that I allowed my mind to wander as I read your letter and indulged in a fantasy involving you being the maid of honor at your friend's wedding. You signed the marriage certificate as a witness with a signature different from the one you normally use, then somehow brought that before the court to argue that it was forged and the marriage is invalid. Sadly,"
A young, successful woman plans to marry a man more than twice her age who has been married six times, has multiple estranged children, is unemployed, broke, and was couch-surfing when they met eight months ago. A close friend, with personal experience of an abusive marriage, identifies love-bombing and early abusive behaviors and has pleaded for delay; the bride dismisses concerns and wants children immediately. The friend worries about a pattern of failed marriages and absent family relationships. Recommended actions include prioritizing safety, offering steady nonjudgmental support, setting boundaries, documenting concerns, and engaging professional resources or authorities if abuse occurs.
Read at Slate Magazine
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