Most Kids Don't Need Therapy: Here's What May Help More

"After 20 years of doing therapy directly with children and teens, however, I have concluded that parents are overreliant on therapy as a solution that may not be solving as much as they hope. Instead, the spark of change is more likely to come from the parents than from a therapist."

"I spend weeks teaching a child coping strategies for strong emotions, but their brains often aren't developed enough to remember and apply these strategies in the midst of a meltdown. When I work with parents, we discuss patterns of triggers for meltdowns, how to get ahead of potential meltdowns with prevention strategies, and how to respond during a meltdown so as not to exacerbate the child's emotional dysregulation."

"Relying on a young child to learn and use coping strategies during these episodes of emotional dysregulation simply does not yield the same results as working with parents on influencing the conditions contributing to the dysregulation."

Parents increasingly seek therapy for children experiencing struggles that may be developmentally normal, driven by heightened media attention to youth mental health crises and reduced stigma around mental health. However, direct child therapy often proves less effective than parent-focused interventions. Children's developing brains struggle to apply coping strategies during emotional dysregulation. Parent coaching that addresses meltdown triggers, prevention strategies, and appropriate responses yields superior results. Working with parents to influence conditions contributing to dysregulation proves more powerful than placing the burden of change on children themselves. This shift in approach recognizes that parents can be the primary lever for meaningful behavioral change.

Read at Psychology Today