So You Want to Come to My New Vinyl-Listening Bar

"Welcome to Needle & Monk, Brooklyn's newest Japanese-style vinyl listening bar. This is not "just another bar hidden behind a secret door inside a Bushwick haberdashery." This is a sanctuary for sound, a cathedral of crackle, a temple devoted to the art of shutting up and listening to a record properly for once in your life. Below are a few simple guidelines to insure that everyone's experience remains as spiritually transcendent as possible."

"No RequestsThe music is curated, not crowdsourced. This is not a jukebox. This is a journey. If you approach the d.j. booth and utter the phrase "Do you take requests?" you will be handed earplugs and told to meditate in silence. Remain SeatedYou may get up to use the rest room, but only between sides. During songs, please remain still. Any movement above shoulder level will be interpreted as dance and is strictly forbidden."

Needle & Monk is a Japanese-style vinyl listening bar in Brooklyn that enforces strict entry requirements and ritualized etiquette to preserve focused listening. Guests must present ID, three references, and a Discogs wish list for admission. Conversation is limited to soft murmurs, with louder speech resulting in placement in a Whispering Corner. Phones are checked and recording or identification apps are banned; track information is provided on handwritten slips. The music is curated and requests are refused. Patrons must remain seated and still during songs, order silently, avoid touching or looking at records, and leave fingerprints on a first-press before exiting.

Read at The New Yorker