I'm looking for advice on how to deal with my competitive best friend. We've been in each other's lives for a very long time now (since we were children, and we were particularly close during our mid-late teenage years). We are now both in our early 30s, with long-term partners. In the last few years, it feels like she makes everything in our lives a competition by comparing anything she can. She comes off as envious at times, and I feel like she belittles and patronizes others as a way of dealing with that.
My partner and I are expecting a baby of our own early next year, and I'm worried about how our friendship will be affected. I already worry that our children will be unfairly compared to each other and that she will try and turn "child-rearing" into yet another competition. I already feel the struggles of maintaining our friendship right now, and I know she can feel that I am distancing myself from her. But at the same time, I don't want to lose my best friend. When she's not being competitive or patronizing, she is wonderful, thoughtful, kind, and one of the only people who understands me. And I know she would love on our baby very much (and it sure does take a village!). I just can't stand h
Try talking to your friend about how her competitive behavior makes you feel and express your concerns about the future. Setting boundaries and seeking outside help from a therapist or counselor can also provide guidance on how to navigate this situation and maintain your friendship.
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