The One Factor That Makes or Breaks a Conversation

"In most cases of people actually talking to one another, human communication cannot be reduced to information. The message not only involves, it is, a relationship between speaker and hearer. Every conversation is affected by the quality of the relationship in that moment. The way you receive and respond to what is said invites others to engage with you or makes them wary of your motives."

"The human soul doesn't want to be advised or fixed or saved, it simply wants to be witnessed - to be seen, heard, and companioned exactly as it is. Your desire to learn and understand others' views before sharing your own creates the respectful flow necessary for genuine engagement."

"The back-and-forth flow in a conversation must feel easy to relieve tension instead of creating friction. If there isn't a comfortable flow where people feel heard, understood, and their thoughts are important even if you don't agree, you won't get the outcome you hope for."

Successful conversations depend on establishing comfortable flow where people feel heard and understood. The quality of relationship in any moment affects communication outcomes. Rather than entering conversations with intentions to change or fix someone, approach with calm, inviting accessibility. People need to feel witnessed and valued, even when disagreeing. Creating flow requires positive intention and genuine desire to understand others' perspectives before rushing to share your own ideas. Without this reciprocal back-and-forth that relieves tension, conversations create friction and fail to achieve desired outcomes.

Read at Psychology Today