"A busy life and demanding job can leave you emotionally depleted. When your own head is spinning, it can be hard to switch gears and listen to a partner who is struggling. It may be tempting to instruct them on how to fix things or lecture them on how they should have avoided the problem in the first place. Yet, both responses seem to make things worse."
"When tensions are high and negativity is in the air, your job is not to add to the chaos; it is to help diminish it. The quickest way to soothe your partner so they can catch their breath and regain their balance may be to ask, "Honey, how can I help?" With one statement, you are conveying to your partner that you are on their team and that they are capable of the task at hand."
Busy lives and demanding jobs can leave people emotionally depleted, making it difficult to switch gears and listen to a partner who is struggling. Telling a partner how to fix things or lecturing them often escalates negativity and increases their upset. Asking 'How can I help?' conveys teamwork, offers empowerment, and permits delegation to reduce overwhelm. Asking 'What is the worst part?' indicates that the listener is a safe space and seeks deep understanding. These two questions enable effective support, soothe emotional intensity, and foster closeness by showing sincere understanding and willingness to assist. Providing help in the needed way gives immediate relief while preserving competence.
Read at Psychology Today
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