"I started seeing a man, and after only two weeks of dating, he took me away for the weekend as a birthday gift. It was all adventure and romance. Waterfalls, nice dinners, a hot tub. We were really getting to know each other, and the sex was great. That is, until our middle-aged sex went so wrong I wanted to die. By that I mean I queefed right in his face. If you're wondering how that can happen, let me enlighten you."
"We'd just had an afternoon delight, doggie style with my bum in the air and lots of pulling all the way and pushing back in, which was great and all, but I didn't finish. So he was in position to please me orally, which was going really well until out of nowhere my vagina betrayed me. What came out of my, um, Whispering Cave not only made him jump so high he almost hit his head on the ceiling, it scared the hell out of me."
A woman began dating a man and they shared a romantic weekend, growing closer and enjoying sex. After a vigorous doggie-style session she did not finish, so he moved to give oral stimulation. An involuntary vaginal expulsion (a queef) erupted suddenly and loudly, startling both and causing acute embarrassment. She buried her face in a pillow and they had to address the incident directly. The partner did not laugh and calmly suggested a shower to continue. As she prepared to move, another expulsive sound occurred, amplifying her humiliation and desire to flee.
Read at Scary Mommy
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