"The solution is not to continue to bear the burden. Special occasions, especially at holidays, often fall on one person's shoulders by default and by deflection. Often, it's a woman, reflecting some family members' assumptions that it's her responsibility and she wants to do it. You may be or have been happy to host, and you can also be worn out from hosting now. Both can be true, and your family can and should hear that."
"It's not too late to talk to your nephew and your sister and say that, after 45 years, Thanksgiving is outpacing you and you need the family to take a greater role in making it happen. It's important that the work you're doing not go unseen. Holidays don't just happen. By saying, This is a lot of work; can you help me host it? you offer your family the chance to step up, which can enrich their experience of the holiday."
Hosting Thanksgiving for 45 years has become physically and emotionally burdensome as family size increased to include multiple extended-family members and overnight guests. One host now faces hosting six or more additional people for multi-day visits, creating capacity and workload issues. Declining energy and assumptions that hosting is one person's responsibility have made continuing without changes unsustainable. The host can set clear boundaries by asking relatives to share responsibilities, shorten stays, contribute meal preparation, hire cleaning help, or otherwise make hosting easier. Open communication about capacity and specific requests for help can shift burden and allow family members to participate in creating the holiday experience.
Read at www.mercurynews.com
Unable to calculate read time
Collection
[
|
...
]