The article discusses the pervasive influence of the inner critic and its harmful effects through relentless 'shoulds' and 'shouldn'ts.' It emphasizes that while internalized expectations are necessary for societal functioning, excessive self-criticism can drain motivation and self-worth. Individuals are encouraged to evaluate their internal messages and distinguish between constructive and toxic thoughts by assessing their emotional impact. By recognizing the source of these criticisms, which may stem from critical figures in one's past, one can use techniques like externalizing to quiet harmful thoughts and foster a healthier self-dialogue.
If the inner critic incessantly or ruthlessly chimes in, it can lead to a downward spiral of self-recrimination that can leave you feeling lousy and hinder positive action.
When you identify a should or shouldn't that's causing distress, notice whether it inspires and motivates you or leaves you feeling paralyzed, anxious, or hopeless.
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